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Born in Canada and educated on Uranus (is it any wonder he's an ass?), Rich made a pilgrimage at the age of 9 to beautiful Alaska, a cultural Mecca and epicenter of rock music, where he is considered by many locals to be "the best thing since that kid who could hum and whistle at the same time." While he wasn't getting hammered in local bars, 12-year-old Rich spent his spare time hanging out in the local pawn/music shop, practicing the licks that would one day bring him world-wide acclaim, and annoying the piss out of patrons and owner alike. (life's not that much different for him now, he just annoys his employees and innocent children instead). Then he went to Berkley, toured the world in bands, was ranked #1 in the world in Ju-Jitsu, and other shit like that. He also became the Most Honored King of the Land of Badested where he is fondly known as King Dick. Now, he is back in sunny VA to reek havoc on the ears of rednecks once again. (Ask him to play Freebird sometime. Really, he'll love it.)

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